Reviews

Silent Hill

What’s black and blue and two hours long?  Silent Hill the movie.  No one is shocked Silent Hill is receiving at best tepid reviews.  I was part of the crowd who saw the previews and hoped Silent Hill would right the wrongs made by Uwe Boll and Paul Anderson.  I guess what I should be thankful for is baby steps. 

Silent Hill’s main folly is it’s way too long.  I understand it wanted to pay homage to the game and to all the people who played it.  I’m one of those people and the film does have its moments that will tickle the gamers inner dork.  If you haven’t played the game you might find yourself sitting in the dark for two hours wondering what you got yourself into. 

Silent Hill isn’t as good as I hoped it would be.  It’s also not as bad as I thought it was going to be.  It’s full of bad dialogue and people making one stupid decision after another.  I know if I were being pulled over by the police, having done nothing wrong and my daughter in the car, I would try to outrun them too.  After the two main characters fight off a hideous monster one will say, “They say this town is haunted.”  To which the other replies, “I’m starting to think they’re right.”  Not even the video game had lines that mundane.  And it’s not like they were shooting for the high school target audience since the film received an R rating.  

The whole movie, aside from the special effects, felt like it was thrown together way too fast.  What haunts Silent Hill?  The groans of ticket holders.  During the runtime of the movie you get to see a handful of monsters.  That’s a problem considering the game had many more spooks to bump into while wandering streets and sewers.  The Pyramid Head villain is clearly going to be the crowd pleaser and his combined screen time is about seven minutes.  The last time I saw him on screen I got excited because the volume on this flick was finally getting turned up.  Then that was it.  No more violent slaughter from the most appealing character and no explanation on where he went.

Gans would have been better off taking elements from the game that worked to make his own movie.  When it works it’s cool to see in live action on the big screen.  Just too little spread too thin.  I love story and development but this all felt like filler.  At least we’re one baby step closer to getting a decent game to movie translation.  Maybe Halo can pull it off.  And in the end, does it really matter?  Maybe we’re talking about a media marriage that was never meant to happen.

4.5/10

Andy

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